I needed to vent.. just slightly. Here goes.. I NEED A VACATION NOW!!!!! LOL. I am simply worn out! The last few weeks have been rough at work. The weather is messing with people’s immune systems/sinuses. Plus, I am still working some overtime when I can get it. Today, they scheduled just me and the pharmacist to do the work of 3 or 4 people. Tomorrow.. I work with a new technician after 5pm to close.. on a Monday for Pete’s SAKE! If they aren’t trying to kill me, they must think I am superwoman or something. I am not.. just super worn out LOL. Yes, I can type fast and get things moving through, but my whole body hurts at this point LOL. Enough about work.. was just a short little vent.

My eye surgery went well as far as I can tell. Eyesight is back to 20/20, maybe better than that now in my right eye, but like I said above, I am worn out. That, plus these stupid migraine headaches I have been getting. Thank you Lord for Excedrin Migraine!!! (and its generic knock-offs)  And onto better things such as the gas prices going down *knock on wood*. I might be able to afford to get some bills paid down. Plus, I have seriously got to get my GRE taken for grad school so I can move on with my life.. and do something that will make me happy! That being said, it isn’t that I don’t like my job.. it just isn’t my calling in life is all.

I am also thinking of taking on a second (seasonal) job during the Christmas holidays to help pay off some bills as well. I know, I don’t have enough time as it is, but I want to get ahead when and where I can. Things have just been sooo tight money-wise. But hey, I found an excellent deal today. At my apartment complex, we have a trash compactor instead of a bunch of dumpsters. Well, when people move out, and don’t want to take stuff with them that others could use.. they sit it along the wall of the compactor area. I was driving by and saw a very nice microwave cart for my tiny kitchen today.. that is the first time I have ever done anything like that too. I brought it in, Greenworks’d it well, and vwallaaah.. I have a new place to store some necessary kitchen stuff..instead of using up my much needed counter space. My apartment doesn’t have a pantry, although, on the floor plans it says that it does for each one. Instead, we each all have our own hot water heaters in the pantry.. meaning.. no place to store stuff. I have been wanting and needed a microwave cart for sometime now.. I just did not have the funds for it. All it needed was a little good scrubing, and it is nearly good as new. Fantastic!

I was sitting here listening to “Crazy” by Aerosmith, and thinking, hmm.. maybe I should update on the dating issue in my life. Back during summer, I started chatting with a guy online.. or rather, he started chatting with me. I was not looking for anyone because I was seriously down after getting my heart broken to pieces earlier in the year. As my friend NK would call it, I was mostly in “man-batical” mode. We were supposed to meet and go on a date, but Hurricane Ike, plus extenuating circumstances, put a hold on that for a bit. So far, things are going well, although we have yet to meet face-to-face, but hopefully, that will be remedied soon.

No, we did not meet on a dating website, but rather on facebook. I simply could not bring myself to PAY someone to find me a date, although my co-workers and friends were pushing me to do so to simply get me away and over CS. That being said, I did at least look into them, but I did not fit very many guy’s criteria, especially in the ethnicity department. It would seem that most American men are not interested in dating women of Native American ancestry for some strange reason. So, my best friend suggested just playing around with an application on facebook.. one that didn’t cost a dime, and was simply for fun. In the flirting/dating application that facebook has on it, you bascially click on the buttons ”yes” or “wink!” if you would ever consider dating the person, or “no” if you would not. The person nevers knows if they have been clicked on for any of the options unless both people mutually clicked “yes” on each other’s picture. In fact, I almost did not talk to this guy at all LOL, and he was the one who messaged me first. I seriously tried to ignore the poor guy at first, but he persisted in wanting to simply chat with me. He did not ask for anything more, he wasn’t a perv nor a horn-dog, he did not ask me very personal questions, he did not criticize me, nor did he try to tell me what to do.

What did we talk about then you may ask? Well, computers mostly, since that was his current job field, or least part-time job field. We would talk about the different applications out there, etc. for them. In fact, his profile picture at the time was a bit obscure and I had almost clicked “no” on him because I was basing my judgement on visuals alone, which is not really in my nature to do. One day, he sent me a friend request, and everytime he was online at the sametime I was, he would chat me down until I’d have to go or vice versa. For a shy person like me, the whole email/instant messenger thing is a blessing in disguise. I have learned more about him through online discussions than I think I would have if we’d first met in person simply because for some reason, online, I am not as afraid to give voice to my questions that I would like answers to. I have discovered something though… This guy makes me seriously happy. He makes me smile and laugh.. constantly. And if he can’t be online or something, he’ll leave me little messages or draw on his profile picture little aliens, spaceships, ladybugs, etc.. just so I will cheer up and laugh. He gives me something I didn’t know I needed before, something I had never receieved to know that I needed.. respect. 

Every relationship I have ever had has ended in friendship or disaster.. take your pick. Most of the time, the guy ends up fessing up that he wants to date a friend of mine instead.. LOSER! … or, we started as friends, tried dating, and simply returned to just being friends because of mutually not feeling the spark for the other in the romantic field. My mom worries about me dating anyone.. telling me how naive and stupid I am when it comes to guys.. perhaps she is right, but it is my mistake to make, not hers, and so far, I have made plenty in the past. I seem to have a LOT in common with this guy.. and it isn’t me just telling him things, and him saying he likes the samething too.

So far, this is a guy that I do not want to lose… he seems like a good guy, and they are so hard to find it would seem. Most of them are simply taken already LOL. My mom even asked me since this guy is great looking, why he wasn’t married already, or if he was actually divorced. I explained to her that no, he’s never been married, but that we have discussed reasons things did not work out for us in past relationships. His being that he was with a girl that decided she did not want a committment.. that she wanted to instead play the field. Sound familiar? Some of the same kind of thing I went through with the last jerk. Plus, this guy is very open and tells me anything and everything I want to know, or stuff I wouldn’t think to ask. He doesn’t try to hide from me when his ex emails him, begging him back because she has changed her mind.. he instead, chooses to discuss it with me, including the response that he has moved on and found someone better, someone that makes him truly happy.. me.

Trust, honesty and respect for one another are very important to me. Now that I have experienced them, I don’t want to turn back to my previous ignorance. I pray things continue to go well, and we are planning on meeting Thanksgiving weekend *fingers crossed*, since he lives a few hours away, in a neighboring city I guess you could call it LOL. Wish me the best of luck!

Sometimes I fear that I will become the crazy cat lady. I fear that I WILL end up all alone with just an apartment full of cats. I am naturally an animal lover. We have always had pets, usually cats, because of the pastures and woods around our home when I was growing up. At the moment, I do have a cat that lives with me. When I am feeling sad and lonely, she is there for me to snuggle up with and talk to..but although she yowls and meows a lot..she can’t talk back.

My cat Icey is a seal lynx-point Siamese mix. I took her in when she was at least 3 months old, wild, and covered with fleas. She got 3 baths that day to rid her of the fleas. She’s the perfect picture of health now and will be 4 this coming April. She is VERY perculiar though. She does not like other cats, but will tolerate dogs, probably due to growing up around my dogs at home during her kitten year. She can’t stand for any other animal to take my attention. On occasion, she just gets too rough and likes to bite and kick me like she would playing with another animal, but she loves me to death. Almost nothing better than snuggling up on a cold night with a warm, purring kitty.

She is also very protective of me around other humans she doesn’t know. With guests, she’s got to sniff your shoes first. If you check out, she MIGHT let you pet her. If she gets a bad vibe off of you, BEWARE. She will attack. I have heard that animals are a good indicator of how trustworthy people are. Luckily for me, she loves to curl up my guy’s lap. She enjoys purring and getting scratched and will bring her toys to entice play.

After much thought though, I don’t think I could stand to have more than one indoor cat. They are like children. They will bug you when you’re on the phone, can’t stand for you to close the door when you’re taking a shower, etc. So perhaps, a cat is just a good trial run for any children I may end up having one day. She has definitely taught me tolerance and patience besides unconditional love.

One thing I look for in a guy, he has to be able to get along with my cat. She is my protector and I hers. We are a team that can be added to, but not separated. CS likes playing with her, although she startles him alot. I guess that is due to cultural differences. He never had a pet, although he wanted one, growing up. So perhaps Icey will permanently adopt him one day too.